This is a guest post from Brad Allen of BradWAllen.com. He previously wrote a touching and very important post called Life Is Too Short.
On the Engaged Marriage Facebook page, Dustin will frequently ask what couples are planning to do over the weekend. I’m sure one of the reasons is because he’s interested in seeing what active couples do for fun on their time off together that will aid in the health of their marriage.
He also writes often on Engaged Marriage about how important it is to take time as a married couple to focus on just that: being a couple.
I’m not going to lie, my wife and I have 2 kids, with a 3rd on the way, and it’s hard as hell to find the time to really give each other the attention we both need.
It’s kind of the whole premise behind Engaged Marriage, the Marriage Time Newsletter and Dustin’s 7 step guide – Marriage Mojo…ways to find that very important time together.
I read Dustin’s questions on Facebook but rarely answer those questions because we typically don’t have much going on besides “the usual,” but this weekend is different. We do actually have plans that fit with the driving theme of Engaged Marriage, and I’m prepared to answer his question.
Tonight, my wife and I are dropping our kids off at their Grandparent’s house then we’re heading to The Hill in St. Louis (Italian District if you will) for dinner. Afterward, we’re going to see Jerry Seinfeld at The Fox theater and after that?
We’re staying the night at The Westin hotel. I even called ahead to make sure we got a room with a big bathtub because we plan to relax, together.
With no kids and everything planned out ahead of time the only thing we have to focus on is each other. And Jerry Seinfeld… and that’s really the secret.
Plan ahead. Just like putting chicken out to thaw for dinner that evening to avoid a run to McD’s, if you plan ahead, you can make it happen.
We do these “Super” date nights a couple times a year on top of a longer weekend (we prefer somewhere out of the state so we have to fly) for our anniversary. We do this because it allows us to simply be a married couple for a little bit. To rely on each other. To remind ourselves why we got married to begin with. To help keep our romance alive. To keep our marriage healthy.
Find the time. After all, life is too short not too. 🙂
My wife and I headed out on a date last night. We tried out a new restaurant and then perused a favorite bookstore together. Afterward we headed back home and snuggled up on the couch to watch a favorite show.
The most useful thing we’ve found is to actually schedule them. We sit down at the beginning of the month with our planners and decide on a date. Then that evening is occupied and we know to plan around it. We’re both full-time college students with part-time jobs. Between school, work, and homework, we rarely see each other, so scheduling dates is important. Without consciously making time, it would be easy for us to go more than a month without an actual date. This one-date-a-month minimum helps us keep focused on each other.
I totally agree, Matthew! We have established a bi-monthly date night, and we decided to pick Tuesday nights because it’s less busy during the week for both us and our babysitter. It’s new for us this year, but it’s been great!
Life is TOO short to miss these memory-making moments with your best friend and companion. Great job!
Absolutely, Tom and Debi!
As an “almost married couple” (5 weeks away from the wedding) funny thing is we were also there last night at Seinfeld. Nothing like a date night 🙂
I’m really excited for you and your fiance, David. I wish I could have been there with you guys, too. 🙂
Back from our Super Date Night. Had a blast. Dinner was fantastic, Seinfeld was hilarious, the hotel was nice and breakfast this morning was nice and quiet. My wife and I work so well together and it’s this kind of thing that proves it again and again. It’s a great reminder!
@David – Hope you guys enjoyed Seinfeld as much as we did!
I love it, man. Thanks again for sharing this great post!
Great blog! I was searching for dating and relationship blogs and found your site through another blog I found searching: www.burisonthecouch.wordpress.com
I enjoyed their humor and insight. I’m glad searching led me your way. Thanks for the post! I’ll be sure to follow.
Thanks Becky, and welcome!
Thanks Dustin! I look forward to following!
The great marriage journey comes from constant communication. Communication is more than just words. It is tone, gestures, and body language. A simple date that brings a lot of memories revives the love that was once promised during the wedding day.
Thanks to your website, I’m a 13-year-old marriage expert. Somehow I ended up here (I think it was a result of WikiHow?) and I suppose in 10 years it’ll come in handy. But for now, it’s lovely entertainment!