imagesIf marriage is like a house, then romance is the central air and heat.

Think about it. A marriage can make it without romance–many couples have proven this fact, just as you can live in a house without central air and heat. It may be do-able, but it certainly won’t be as enjoyable.

When things get difficult in your life–trouble with work, children, schooling, relationships–it’s nice to know your spouse is there to let you vent about the struggle. It’s even better if your spouse plans something special, romantic even, to help you get your mind off the trouble at hand.

Romance is NOT foreplay, but it can be.

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Any husband or wife, who is using romance as a way to get what they want in the bedroom, is abusing this very special gift.

Romance is like a comfortable chair in your favorite room of the house. It feels right.

Romance has the ability to cool a heated situation or heat up your relationship when the air has chilled.

Romance is something you share with your spouse alone. No one else has the privilege of romancing you, and vice versa.

Do you see romance as more of a privilege or an obligation?

How you answer this question is key to how successful showing romance to your spouse will be.

It’s Christmas, the time of year our children anticipate the other eleven months of the year. It’s our job to make it special for them. But it’s also a great time to romance the one who will be there when your children are grown and gone.

Following are some easy ways to incorporate romance this Christmas season:

  1. Go for a walk after dark to see the Christmas lights in your neighborhood.
  2. Order dinner at your favorite restaurant for pick-up after the kids are in bed. Set the table with your favorite candles and play Christmas music softly in the background.
  3. Plan your own surprise of the 12 Days After Christmas, where your spouse gets to open one special box a day beginning December 26th. Fill it with coupons, candies or treats you know they’ll appreciate.
  4. Put lights up in your bedroom. This is the one time of year you can get away with having special romantic lighting in your room and no one will bat an eye, but maybe your spouse. 😉
  5. Make a personal Christmas tree in your bedroom. Decorate it with pictures and souvenirs from special places you’ve been together.
  6. Mail your spouse a romantic Christmas card and spend time expressing your love to them with carefully composed words. Check out Hallmark’s customized Christmas cards that you can add your own special photos and messages to!
  7. Mail your spouse a romantic Christmas card and spend time expressing your love to them with carefully composed words.
  8. Have a photo book made of all the Christmases you’ve enjoyed together. Give it to them on Christmas Eve after the kids are in bed.
  9. Make it a tradition of opening your gifts to each other on Christmas Eve, so you can take your time and enjoy each gift without interruptions.
  10. Watch your favorite Christmas movie together.
  11. Give your spouse a foot massage–or treat them to an unexpected pedicure after a long day of shopping.

What’s the temperature in your marriage? Maybe a little romance is in order–give it a try and see if it doesn’t make things much more enjoyable. 🙂

Merry Christmas and a very Happy and Blessed New Year!


(photo source)


About the author 

Debi Walter

Tom and Debi Walter have been cultivating their romantic vineyard for most of their 36 years of marriage. It has been their conviction from the start. Now they are passionate about helping other couples discover the rich harvest of romance available to them no matter the current season. Through their marriage blog, The Romantic Vineyard established in 2008, they provide regular posts about growing your marriage for God's glory.

Dustin Riechmann created Engaged Marriage to help other married couples live a life they love (especially) when they feel too busy to make it happen. He has many passions, including sharing ways to enjoy an awesome marriage in 15 minutes a day, but his heart belongs with his wife Bethany and their three young kids.

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