When you’re stressed and in a constant battle with your to-do list, the last thing on your mind is your relationships.
After all, you have to finish the deadline for work, get the kids homework done, clean up the dog’s war with the pillows, and attempt to make lasagna for dinner tonight from scratch.
However, in the midst of it all and other things that life seems to continually throw at us, is our partner.
Despite the fact that they so obviously want to be with us – after all, they married us, sometimes we can forget the fundamental aspects of being in a relationship.
That is why we should be making time for each other and actively attempting to communicate, connect and have fun with the other person.
This is really hard to achieve if all you can currently think about is the looming bills or the never-ending piles of dishes in the sink.
But if you simply took time to recharge your own batteries, to indulge your own desires and hobbies, you might find that you are more able to sit through a nine-hour Star Wars marathon that your partner has been meaning to get to for the past couple of weeks.
What are the benefits of self-indulgence for you?
One of the main benefits touted is the reduction in overall stress levels through the art of doing whatever it is you want.
Nothing is off limits during this me time extravaganza.
From an episode of Netflix, to getting your nails or hair done, to going for a hike, or even just curling up with a good cup of coffee and a book, the options are endless. And really you are only limited by your imagination.
Since “me time” is traditionally something done all on your own, it has been found to grant some women greater belief in themselves and makes them more self-confident.
After all, how many of us have actually been trained in enjoying activities that are all on our own?
So maybe next time take yourself out for lunch and load up on some extra girl power.
A study out of the University of Michigan has reported that couples who did not regularly engage in their own personal activities had even higher cases of self-reported levels of relationship dissatisfaction than couples who were unhappy with their sex lives.
Hence, doing your own thing is more important than previously thought.
Psychologists have further found that “me time” can aid us in numerous ways from raising our productivity at work and our ability to focus on things to giving us space to allow for better personal growth and self-awareness.
Most importantly for those in relationships, a little time taken to work on ourselves has been shown to drastically improve the quality of our relationships.
Ways to implement “me-time” now.
First off, throw away the guilt.
Yes, at first, there are some who won’t understand your need to spend time by yourself and may even feel hurt by your decision.
However, they will greatly appreciate your renewed sense of vitality, fresh perspective and your willingness to put even more of your renewed energy into your relationships with them.
Now, it has been found that the vast majority of people spend their alone time in one of three ways: they either watch television, engage in social pursuits, or throw on their workout gear and dive into whatever sports or leisure activity they can get their hands on.
If you’re thinking, “But I don’t have hours to go and spend in the yoga studio to freshen my soul,” that is absolutely fine.
A British study recently found that as with most things in life, it is not the quantity but the total level of quality or perceived satisfaction that is gained from the activity that actually matters.
Next, if you’re struggling to see when and how you are ever going to find time to engage in all these activities, it’s high time you establish a routine.
Either wake up or go to sleep at different hours from everyone else in your household, or make scheduled dates in your diary, which are allotted to your “me time” activities.
Just like you would prioritize a dentist appointment, you need to prioritize your appointments with yourself.
Finally, the key to achieving your goal of having an amazing relationship with not just your spouse but yourself is going to take commitment.
You need to work at it every day in order to become the power couple and powerful woman of your dreams.
Therefore, why not go out and book that nail appointment, sign up for the yoga class, or grab a coffee and give yourself the time to become the best version of you your relationship so desperately needs.
Sarah is the author of Relax Everyday, where she can teach you a lot more about relaxation and meditation. To achieve healthy relationships, as well as a balanced mind and body, remember to relax. Why not learn how?