Argue Fairly With Your Spouse: The Rules of Engagement
This guest post is presented by Jason from Live Real, Now, a blog about life and money in the real world.
Everyone, at times, has disagreements.
How boring would life be if everyone agreed all of the time? However, if you handle those disagreements the wrong way, it could mean disaster.
This is particularly true when you are arguing with your spouse.
You spend most non-working moments with this one person, this wonderful, loving, infuriating person. Your emotions will naturally run high while discussing the things you care most about with the person you care most about. Arguments are not only natural, but inevitable.
How do you have an argument with someone you love without lasting resentment?
As strange as it may sound, you have to argue fairly.
The Rules of Engagement
There are a few principles to remember during an argument with your husband or wife:
- When your partner is talking, your job is to listen with all of your energy. You are not interrupting. You are not planning your rebuttal while waiting for your turn to talk.
You are listening, nothing else. If you don’t listen, you can’t understand. If you don’t understand, you can’t find a resolution.
Green With Envy: How to Overcome Jealousy in Your Marriage
Editor’s Note: This is a great guest post by Thomas Warren. Thomas asked if he could share his thoughts on jealousy in marriage, and I thought it was a wonderful topic for our community.
Love and trust are the basis for a sound marriage, so if either of these ingredients is missing, you may begin to wonder why you’re in a relationship at all. While love is something that is maintained emotionally, trust can shaken by both emotional and psychological forces.
You enter into marriage believing that it will last forever and that the person you have chosen to spend the rest of your life with feels the same way. But then, for one reason or another, jealousy rears its ugly head.
It is extremely common for married individuals to experience jealousy, and in small doses, it can actually ensure that you don’t take each other for granted. But if the problem persists, you’re going to have to find a way to deal with it or risk reneging on your vows.
So How Can You Overcome Jealousy?
Communication is a good place to start. This is really the key to resolving any conflict in a relationship (and to keeping your marriage healthy). If you have nagging doubts, this is the best way to clear them up.
Beer With A Buddy: Conversations on Life and Marriage
Without a doubt, my wife is my best friend, and she is my go-to person for just about every conversation. We can talk about anything, and we do our best to find time every day to get together for a great chat.
While I love talking to my wife, I find that sometimes you just need some time out of the house with a friend to help clear your mind and get a fresh perspective on life.
I find these times to be really refreshing, and I usually come away from a little bar time full of ideas and energy (as long as I don’t overdo it with the beer 
).
Beer With A Buddy Time, as I like to call it, is an important part of living a full life and a healthy marriage.
Get Out!
Of course, alcohol doesn’t have to a centerpiece of this time. While I enjoy a cold, frosty one and prefer to chat at night after the kids are in bed and my family time is over, you can meet a friend for a meal, some great coffee or a round of golf. The important ingredients are simply you, a good friend and a free mind.
5 Ways to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking
Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Louise Baker. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!
Nonverbal communication is an important part of how human beings relate to one another.
The important thing to remember is that the unconscious mind is powerful, and it can pick up on many different things about another person even if they are not obvious.
For instance, body language is a perfect example of nonverbal communication. A person’s posture tells people a lot about how that person thinks about himself.
Within a marriage relationship, nonverbal communication is even more important. It has been estimated that over ninety percent of the effectiveness of communication is facilitated by nonverbal cues. Obviously, it’s important to understand how improving nonverbal communication can improve your marriage relationship!
Five Ways to Improve Your Marriage Through Nonverbal Communication
Give these five tips a try in the daily interaction with your spouse and see what a difference you can make without saying a word:
1. Make sure you always express affection.
Marriage as a Competitive Sport
Editor’s Note: This is a guest post by Susan Mallery. I’m excited to help Susan kick-off a guest writing tour on a series of relationship and marriage sites in support of her latest novel (details below).
Susan is a best-selling romance/fiction writer and a strong supporter of marriage and our efforts here at Engaged Marriage. Please welcome her and her fans to our community!
Everyone’s gone to dinner with a couple who just don’t seem to like each other.
As you fidget uncomfortably, Mr. Mean complains that his wife washed a red sweater with the whites, then he flashes his pink socks. Mrs. Mean snaps back that if he worked harder, they could afford new socks. They pretend the character slams are all in good fun, but you can hear the vein of bitterness beneath their words.
Worse, you can feel that bitter energy in the room. Spend time with Mr. and Mrs. Mean, and your soul shrivels a little more with every minute.
What Happened to This Couple?
The Means didn’t start out that way. Like most couples, they were giddily in love on their wedding day. So where did they go wrong?
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I'm Dustin, the guy behind Engaged Marriage. I'm living and loving the crazy life of a young husband and Dad.
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