Engaged Marriage » Ask the Community

What Are Your Goals for 2011? I May Be Able to Help

Dustin — Wed, 29 Dec 2010 10:00:52 +0000

Well, here comes the New Year!

It’s a great time to reflect on the blessings, struggles and lessons from the past year and start planning for an awesome next 365 days and beyond. I’d love to hear what goals you have in mind for 2011, so please share those in the comments below!

If you were around a year ago, you’ll remember the incredibly fun and successful Improve Yourself! 2010 event that we held here. Everything from that series of posts is still relevant (other than the giveaways!) if you’d like to check them out to help with your goal planning.

I’ve had a few folks ask me if there will be a similar challenge as we enter 2011. Well, I thought about it, but decided to do something different this year. I want to do something that is more specific, practical and impactful.

Why the “Big Thing” for 2011 Will Not Actually Be Hosted Here

While I plan to continue to tackle all the big issues impacting marriage here on the blog and in my new e-book 15 Minute Marriage Makeover (coming out soon), I’ve had a particularly strong interest in helping couples and individuals improve their fitness (and their relationships) lately. That’s why Fit Marriage was created with my friend Tony DiLorenzo, and the early growth and popularity of our site makes it clear that we are addressing a real need!

However, I also recognize that many of the readers here at Engaged Marriage may have no interest in fitness-related content or help. So…the “Big Thing” to kick off 2011 will be taking place over at Fit Marriage, and I’ll try to refrain from talking about it much here.

Here’s the “Big Thing”

Actually, there are two “big things” and one of them will start before the New Year even arrives!

I can’t actually disclose the first event (for reasons that will be evident when it is released), but if you are looking to improve your health and fitness in a way that enhances your family life rather than competing with it, you’ll love this.

The second event is something I am very proud to have pulled off (with Tony obviously). It’s a series of video interviews with 12 of the top experts in the world on fitness, nutrition and motivation for busy individuals and couples. It is seriously helpful and inspiring. The best part is we are able to offer access to the full program (called the Quick Fit Formula) for FREE for a limited time when it opens up for registration. It’s not open just yet, but it will be shortly after the New Year.

How You Can Get Access to Both Awesome Fitness-Improving “Big Things”

It’s easy. You just need to get signed up for the Fit Marriage newsletter. Click that link and enter your name and email, and you’ll be all set. And if you don’t like anything we send you, you can “unsubscribe” with a single click…no worries.

The only way anyone will know about Big Thing #1 is through the Fit Marriage newsletter since that’s the only way we’re announcing it. And Big Thing #2 will be opened up first to our newsletter audience. It’s our way of saying “thanks” for being an active part of the Fit Marriage community and allowing us to share our content with you via email every week or two.

So, if you are looking to reach some new fitness goals as we enter 2011, or you just want to improve your marriage by living an active, thriving lifestyle with your family, we are doing our part to help you.

If this interests you, please go get signed up for the Fit Marriage newsletter before you miss Big Thing #1.

And please share your goals for 2011, fitness and otherwise, below!

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Check out the original post and leave a comment on the blog here: What Are Your Goals for 2011? I May Be Able to Help

Technorati Tags: Ask the Community, Exercise, Fitness, Holiday, Time Management

15 Minute Marriage Makeover (it’s coming…)

Dustin — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 17:10:39 +0000

After much consternation, I’m happy to let you all know that my new e-book has a name: 15 Minute Marriage Makeover.

I really appreciate all of the interest and great suggestions in the Name the E-Book Contest. In the end, I decided to tweak the title and didn’t actually use any of the entries exactly. However, I am still going to send a free copy of the new book to the closest entry, which was my friend Brad Chaffee who suggested “The 15 Minute Marriage.”

I’m still kicking around a few subtitles, but I think the frontrunners are “Your Proven Plan for Better Sex, Romance, Communication & Finances in Just Minutes a Day” OR “Refresh Your Relationship, Add Sizzle to Your Sex Life & Be Happier Together in Just Minutes a Day”

I’d love to hear your thoughts on these, and any other suggestions you may have in the comments.

Now that I have a title, I can put the finishing touches on the writing and get this thing to a designer to get a great cover and nice layout. If you or someone you know designs e-books, please send me an email to Dustin [at] EngagedMarriage [dot] com and let me know about it. I’d love to hire someone from our community for this!

Also, if you’re interested, don’t forget to add yourself to the early notification list so you can snag a nice discount when 15 Minute Marriage Makeover is released in a few weeks. Just click here and enter your email address, and you’re all set.

Have a great weekend everyone, and thanks for your continued support of Engaged Marriage!

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Technorati Tags: Ask the Community, Blog Progress, Communication, Finances, Romance, Sex, Time Management

Ask the Community: Should Your Spouse “Friend” an Old Fling on Facebook?

Dustin — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 09:00:26 +0000

I receive a lot of emails from readers, and I rarely share them here on the blog because they are either too personal or too specific. Well, I recently received a message that I thought would be best addressed as a community, and the sender encouraged me to share it with you to get your feedback.

Here’s the message:

I had a situation happen to me today that I thought might make a good discussion topic for your site – proper social networking etiquette / behavior for married people.

Today, I had an old boyfriend send me a friend request on Facebook. I decided to ignore the request. I haven’t even thought of him in 13 years and there was a good reason I broke it off then.

Is this really someone I want to share the details of my life with anymore? No. Would I be cool with my husband “friending” an old flame? Honestly, I would probably be a little weird about it. Some people are best left in the past.

Here’s where you can help. In the comments below, I’d love to get your opinions on this situation.

How would you feel if you were the one receiving the friend request? Would you feel the need to ask your spouse before you accepted or ignored it?

Would you care if your spouse “friended” an ex-boyfriend or ex-wife?

Do you think Facebook and other social media relationships are totally harmless, or does it actually mean something when you accept “friend” status with someone?

By the way, if you have a question that you’d like to “Ask the Community” here at Engaged Marriage, please send me a message and let me know!

(photo source)

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Technorati Tags: Ask the Community, Communication, Conflict Resolution

How Has Cancer Affected Your Life and Marriage?

Dustin — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 09:00:03 +0000

It seems that cancer has touched almost every life in some way.

Cancer has really been on my mind recently. This weekend the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure was hosted in St. Louis with record participation. My wife Bethany often runs in the race in honor of her grandmother who died from breast cancer just before we started dating, but she opted not to this year given she’s about to give birth. Cancer has affected both of us in a variety of ways over the years, and our marriage has been impacted as well.

The impact of cancer in our lives has been especially meaningful lately, though.

Honoring One of Best Women I’ve Known

On Sunday, Bethany’s Godmother and our close family friend Tracie Gray passed away after fighting ovarian cancer for more than five courageous years. Our relationship with Tracie and her family is deep and meaningful.

We are Godparents to her granddaughter and her daughter is the Godmother of our son. Tracie was my mother-in-law’s best friend, and her husband P.D. is a great friend and bowhunting buddy of mine.

Tracie and P.D. were one of those couples that really personified the goodness of marriage. They were high school sweethearts that always seemed so happy and content with their life. When you spent any time around them, it was obvious they were meant to spend the rest of their lives together.

Bethany and I have been together since our high school years, and some of our first dates ended with movies and pizza at P.D. and Tracie’s house. We have spent many evenings together with them around a campfire, and many days boating in a lake or floating in rafts down a local river. Tracie was literally a part of half of my life.

It is no exaggeration to say that Tracie and P.D. were awesome role models for how marriage was supposed to be. They were great parents, faithful Christians and wonderful examples of how true love looks, acts and perseveres.

In Sickness and In Health

You may recall a recent post I wrote about the difficulty of marriage during periods of prolonged illness. My Dad is struggling as well, but that post was also inspired by Tracie. She was so tough until the end of her life and, just as remarkable, P.D. was a rock of strength at her side through all of the many struggles that accompany the ravages of ovarian cancer.

Tracie’s friends and family were with her and honoring her until her final days. She lived a life that earned the love and respect of many, and the outpouring of support at her recent benefit was incredible. I’m sure the love and honor will be overflowing at her visitation and funeral in the next few days as well.

Tracie was simply an awesome person that touched many lives. It’s another story of the unfairness of cancer and its effect on the lives of so many.

Ovarian Cancer Awareness

After her diagnosis, Tracie’s family started an organization and Facebook page called Teal We Find a Cure to raise awareness of ovarian cancer and generate funds for research. I cannot stress enough the importance of learning about ovarian cancer. From their Facebook page, here is some food for thought:

Do you know what color the ovarian cancer awareness ribbon is? It is TEAL, but most people are not aware.

Most people are also not aware that ovarian cancer is known as the “silent killer” because many of the symptoms are vague and similar to other abdominal problems. Ovarian cancer is the leading cause of gynecologic cancer deaths among women in America.

Only 24 percent of ovarian cancers are diagnosed at an early stage, when the cancer is confined to the ovary. Most cases are diagnosed after the cancer has spread to other parts of the body, making it difficult to treat successfully.

One woman out of every 55 will develop ovarian cancer at some point in her lifetime.

Please do your part and inform the women in your lives about the risks and symptoms of ovarian cancer.

Please Share Your Story

I am sure that most of us have been faced with the impacts of cancer in our married lives.

I’d really appreciate hearing from each of you in the comments about your experiences with cancer.

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Technorati Tags: Ask the Community, My Story, Spirituality

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Marriage and Money: Questions for Young Couples

Dustin — Tue, 30 Mar 2010 12:00:13 +0000

A few days back, I had the pleasure of being interviewed by Matt Bell who is an author, speaker and blogger over at Matt About Money. Matt focuses on Christian finance, and he has already published two books: Money, Purpose, Joy: The Proven Path to Uncommon Financial Success and Money Strategies for Tough Times.

Matt’s current book project is focused on the topic of Marriage and Money, particularly as it relates to young couples both before they get married and in the early years after their vows. Our interview was focused on the issue of Joint vs. Separate Bank Accounts. However, as we spoke for nearly an hour, a few additional themes came up.

Your Input is Needed

Matt is aware of the awesome community we have here at Engaged Marriage, and we decided it would be great to get your feedback on a few key topics. And there’s a chance that your response could be featured in his upcoming book!

Please check out these questions and leave your response to any or all of them in the comments below:

If you’re married, what were some of the biggest initial challenges you faced in bringing your financial lives together? Financially, what do you wish you had known or done before getting married? And what financial issues continue to come up in your marriage?

If you’re engaged, what questions do you have about doing the whole money thing together as husband and wife?

Thank you so much for your feedback and continued support! I know Matt appreciates your input, and I love seeing your responses since it provides good direction for future blog posts.

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Technorati Tags: Ask the Community, Finances, Marriage Preparation, New Marriage