Ask the Community: Should Your Spouse “Friend” an Old Fling on Facebook?

I receive a lot of emails from readers, and I rarely share them here on the blog because they are either too personal or too specific.  Well, I recently received a message that I thought would be best addressed as a community, and the sender encouraged me to share it with you to get your feedback.

Here’s the message:

I had a situation happen to me today that I thought might make a good discussion topic for your site – proper social networking etiquette / behavior for married people.

Today, I had an old boyfriend send me a friend request on Facebook. I decided to ignore the request. I haven’t even thought of him in 13 years and there was a good reason I broke it off then.

Is this really someone I want to share the details of my life with anymore? No. Would I be cool with my husband “friending” an old flame? Honestly, I would probably be a little weird about it. Some people are best left in the past.

Here’s where you can help.  In the comments below, I’d love to get your opinions on this situation.  



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How Has Cancer Affected Your Life and Marriage?

It seems that cancer has touched almost every life in some way.

Cancer has really been on my mind recently.  This weekend the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure was hosted in St. Louis with record participation.  My wife Bethany often runs in the race in honor of her grandmother who died from breast cancer just before we started dating, but she opted not to this year given she’s about to give birth.  Cancer has affected both of us in a variety of ways over the years, and our marriage has been impacted as well.

The impact of cancer in our lives has been especially meaningful lately, though.

Honoring One of Best Women I’ve Known

On Sunday, Bethany’s Godmother and our close family friend Tracie Gray passed away after fighting ovarian cancer for more than five courageous years.  Our relationship with Tracie and her family is deep and meaningful.

We are Godparents to her granddaughter and her daughter is the Godmother of our son.  Tracie was my mother-in-law’s best friend, and her husband P.D. is a great friend and bowhunting buddy of mine.  



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Marriage and Money: Questions for Young Couples

A few days back, I had the pleasure of being interviewed by Matt Bell who is an author, speaker and blogger over at Matt About Money.  Matt focuses on Christian finance, and he has already published two books: Money, Purpose, Joy: The Proven Path to Uncommon Financial Success and Money Strategies for Tough Times.

Matt’s current book project is focused on the topic of Marriage and Money, particularly as it relates to young couples both before they get married and in the early years after their vows.  Our interview was focused on the issue of Joint vs. Separate Bank Accounts.  However, as we spoke for nearly an hour, a few additional themes came up.

Your Input is Needed

Matt is aware of the awesome community we have here at Engaged Marriage, and we decided it would be great to get your feedback on a few key topics.  And there’s a chance that your response could be featured in his upcoming book!

Please check out these questions and leave your response to any or all of them in the comments below:  



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Quick Poll: What Is Holding You Back?

I am happy about my marriage, and I really enjoy living life each day with my wife and kids.  However, I sometimes feel like we could certainly be doing some things better.  This is where we encounter the “constraints” that hold us back from getting all we’d like from our marriage and giving all we’d like to our spouse.

I would really appreciate it if you took a few seconds and answered the two questions below.  I know how I would answer them, but I’m super interested to know about your needs and how we can work together to help you take your marriage to the next level (whatever that may mean in your life).

Thanks for being part of our community, and thanks for your insights!

P.S. – I recently updated the About Page to better convey what this site is all about. I’d love to hear your thoughts on those changes in the comments below.

Technorati Tags: Ask the Community, survey

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What Is An Extraordinary Marriage?

So, just what is an extraordinary marriage? A few weeks back, I turned things over to you all in our first “Ask the Community” post and asked: What Does An Extraordinary Marriage Mean to You?

As expected, the response was awesome, and I learned a lot from your comments on the blog and over on the Engaged Marriage Facebook page.  I wanted to take the opportunity to highlight a few of my favorite answers (my emphasis added) and let you know my own thoughts as well.

Mark gave his thoughts on why some settle for less:

I would say being on mission together for something much bigger than yourselves describes an extraordinary marriage. More than likely, almost every couple would say they want that, but most don’t know how or just don’t want to do the work to be extraordinary and end up settling for less.

Wendy R. did a wonderful job explaining God’s role:  



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